Starting off 2012 with a bang

2 Jan

2012 was great…as long as we were with my family. When we came home it turned into this:

Jan 1st – night: We decided to plan a vacation for February. H gets frustrated with online “lies” (rates that advertise cheaper than they end up being). This frustrates me because I want to be excited. Go to bed.

Jan 2nd – morning: My day off. Last night I told H that I wanted to have a relaxing day – the kind where you plan what you are going to do right as you want to do it (so there is no stress of a schedule to keep.) Alas, I woke up to H beside me, reading some stupid free book that he has no interest in. H is frustrated with me because I didn’t get up early enough to have the productive day he planned. I immediately became upset and hurt because I had specifically told him yesterday that I wanted my day off to be relaxing with no schedule. AND, he had NOT communicated his desire at all, so it was totally unfair to expect me to know he wanted to have me get up early. ARG….this went downhill fast, resulting in my expressing the fact that I can’t respect someone who doesn’t listen to me, or communicate with me, and H saying he wanted to “draw a line in the sand” and “start over”. I don’t work like that. If you’ve ever heard the comparison of men are like waffles and women like spaghetti, well this is true of us. H can put things in a “box” and I have things wound up all in every aspect of my life. Can’t separate. Must resolve.

Right now H is calling places about getting our dog neutered, and I am sitting in my PJ’s with puffy eyes, from realizing that I am actually grieving a death of a dream (another piece of spaghetti) – H’s job that he has, in my opinion, not given an honest effort to.

SO this is very convoluted, and not the best way to begin 2012….but honesty is something, right?

I do have something positive to offer. I found this very cool blog:

She had a very cool thing to do for the new year: 20 downloadable questions to ask yourself. I’m going to do it today. You should take a gander at it if you get a chance. You can even download and print a copy of the Q’ s here.


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